DAY 283

DAY 283
01.12.08
TREE 113

I got up late from staying up late.  I diddled around the house and, frankly, I wasn’t doing much with myself.  Yes, I do climb everyday and keep a journal, but I want to do more.  I’d like to blame my living situation with my parents, but really it’s all on me.  I should be able to do what I want to be happy in any situation, but in my life to date, that is not realistic.  Maybe the best thing for me is to recognize that I am easily distracted by lazy past times: TV, internet, sleeping, etc.  Maybe the best thing for me would be to eliminate the option.  Move out on my own and create a situation where those possibilities for wasting time aren’t present.  Beside the internet, I believe I had that at the Mary Anderson Center and I was happy.  I need to move out of my parents’ house and for the first time be on my own and live how I want.  I have got to start soon because I am going no where right now and the most agonizing part is I’m aware of it every second.  The Daily Climb project is the only thing that’s giving me any sense of hope and any feeling that I am still an artist.  Albeit a lazy one.  I’ve got hopes, dreams, and ideas I want to share and I have to hold myself to a higher standard, be tough on myself or I may never succeed.  And one thing I know for sure is that I hate these crappy jobs that are demeaning and infuriating and make me dread the coming day.  I need to do what I love and good things will come… school, happiness, success.  That is why I made the hard decision of leaving Rachel… to concentrate on myself, my life, and my goals.  I hate to think I’m wasting my time still stuck in the same unhappiness.  Things need to change and I’m the only one capable of doing that for me.

So… following that rant I shall now tell the story of today’s climb.  I drove out to U of L with an hour or so before sunset. 

I parked where I always park, at the corner of 3rd street and Eastern Parkway, an I was sure to feed the meter.  I had to pee so I walked to the bathrooms.  I also wanted to stall a little since a boy, his mother, and their dog were playing on the basketball court right next to my tree. 

The bathrooms were closed till spring.  I’ll hold it, I figured.  Knowing how things have gone in the past, all bodily urges disappear when I climb.  Now, before I left the house this morning I made sure to grab my two navy hoodies.  Not just for warmth but for rope.  I was determined to get up in this tree without resorting to that this time.  So I climbed up onto the bulge and considered the jump as my arms began to tire.  I tried another spot and quickly I was in the same predicament as the first experience.  But I have wised up, and I knew not to keep trying because it would only wear my arms out.  I took off one of my hoodie, slung it over the branch, and tied the sleeves. 

That alone was quite a task using teeth to hold the hoodie while my arms held me on the tree.  I tested the grip a few times and planned my strategy.  I was going to aim for the near, small offshoot limb.  I grabbed my sleeves/rope with both hands and pulled myself up, getting my feet high.  Then I let go with one hand and lunged for the limb.  Yeah, I got it!  It was definitely easier the second time.  Then I just climbed onto the branch and went up from there. 

When I approached this tree, it was the first time I could really see it all.  Last time it was dark and it had a lot of needles.  This time I thought I saw a path up high.  But I got to the strange platform with the hole and that was as far (in terms of height) as I got. 

I started to take pictures. 

The hole really intrigued me.  Instead of just shooting into the hole I set me camera down in it, set the timer, and got some real quality shots of myself gazing into the hole. 

I figured, since I had some cheesy shots from the first time I climbed this tree,

I should do it again.

Then I began to move about the low limbs. 

These amazing, winding, long, and thin branches. 

I was all over the place and in every new spot I pulled out my camera and took more shots.  The whole time I kept looking for a ribbon but never found one.  I couldn’t quite remember if I didn’t tie one last time or if it had been taken by a create to decorate a nest. 

The sun was setting and the people playing below knew I was there but didn’t care. 

That’s good.  I enjoyed my view and this amazing tree. 

I thought about leaving something behind in the hole for someone to find.  Then I realized that no other humans will likely be up in this tree after what I had to go through to get up here.  Plus I didn’t want to clutter a good den with my trash.  So I didn’t.  And when the time was right, I slowly made my way down to my hoodie and untied the arms.  I slung it to the ground and then hung from the limb, monkeyed out, and dropped. 

This is a special tree. 

I have really enjoyed the challenge and its unique characteristics.  A very good climb.

1-13-09:  Definitely one of the best climbs of the project.  Great pictures, a great challenge, one to remember.  I will add though, after reading my entry, I laughed at the mental image of a dog playing basketball. 

I guess I should add how relevant that rant at the top still is.  I imagine I will struggle with my self-sabotage for the rest of my life.  For the most part, I am learning to become more productive and eliminate my distractions.  Not completely, but I get better all the time.  Maybe that rant gives you another insight into what climbing trees means to me. Or at least what it has done to help structure a more productive schedule.

On Sunday (1-11-09) I helped MaryLiz load a bunch of her stuff and take it to her friends’ place.  Sadly she is leaving Louisville for a job in Spain, but I am very excited for her.  After the first load we went back and took another load to her mom’s.  They asked me to stay for dinner and I obliged.  It was a nice dinner and I learned a lot about MaryLiz as a child.  Then I took MaryLiz back to her apartment at Glassworks we hung out a little while longer till I just had to leave so I could climb a tree.  I drove back to my house and pretty much went right back out to climb.  Not wanting to climb another tree by the interstate, I walked down Washington Street to Spring and looked for a tree between Story and Mellwood Avenues.  There is a creek that runs under the road and it’s lined with woods that come up to the edge of the road.  Again I found a good hackberry tree to climb. 

I just realized I climb those a lot.  They have great gripping bark and good strong limbs. 

And when it’s really cold, they don’t freeze my hands like beeches and sycamores do.  Anyway, I shimmied up the trunk, reached the lower branches and then climbed to the top. 

There was a minimal but steady interval of cars going by on the road below.  It was quiet when they weren’t going past and it felt good to sit in the treetop. 

No matter how I am feeling a treetop always feels right, calms me, and the world with all it’s problems seems all right.  I got that strong feeling that night.  Plus I got a few more good shots of car lights streaking by. 

The pictures of the street below are nice without cars, you get that sense of quiet, but they are exciting the with lights streaks.

But like all good things, my climb had to end.  The warmth of the climb was wearing off and my seat was getting uncomfortable.  I went back down the branches and slid down the trunk.  Near the bottom a sapling sneaked under my legs and as I slid it racked me.  It pinched more than anything else, but regardless it sucked.  I panicked and tried to adjust, I slid down a little more and it got worse.  I had to take one hand and pull the sapling back and to the other side of the trunk I was hugging.  I pushed it down and it broke andgave me the relief I needed.  No permanent damage, but something I could have done without.  It kind of shot that feeling of peace I was riding on.  But the slow walk back to the house put me back in it.